If there's one thing I can't understand about myself, it's my feelings towards you. I know I've fluctuated between saying I like you and I don't like you for countless of times. I've said that I'll forget about you and not ever think of you again for the same number of times.
But why is it that whenever something, or even nothing happens, I'll think of you again? The key here is not any random event, but the passing of time. They say that time heals all wounds, but why aren't you fully out of my mind? I can look at other guys, oogle at them, get excited but my mind will still go back to you in the end. It's not fair really. Maybe nothing is ever fair in this world. Maybe we were never meant to be. But all these are just but another 'maybe' in my mind.
What can I do? What can I do about the thoughts of you that pop up in my mind? When the memories, that weren't even between us but just between myself keep coming up to me? When I can't sleep at night because I'm thinking of you?
I've wondered before really. Are you the right one for me? But no matter how much I wonder, I don't know and I'll never know.
Forgetting you was a lie. Sorry. And yet, I don't know if that sorry should be for you or myself. It should probably be for me, since whatever happens to me doesn't affect you anyways. I don't even know whether I should be sad or thankful for your obliviousness.
♥our lips must always be sealed
6:35 PM
Monday, July 30, 2012